I've had about 3 1/2 hours of sleep, so be patient with Me...
before Kar left, She had been becoming more and more depressed, and could not rise out of Her funk, and could not forgive Rags for killing Her Firstborne. She knows why He did, and understands, and agrees with what had to be done, but She simply could not look at the very Man Who had helped make Her Firstborne, and also killed Her Firstborne. It really was that simple. She couldnt let go, She knew She had to but She couldnt. But She also knew that She was the Mother of All ((at the time)), so She had to come up with a way to make the leaving final. Very final. She had to find something to do that would be a killing offense as She had no desire to live anymore, She simply didnt have it in Her, or so She thought at the time. She knew No One would understand needing time away to heal, and that that healing had to come by NOT seeing the very things that were dragging Her down into the sorrow. She also knew Her family, and knew it well, She knew that if She made it look like She was the bad person, and say awful things, to make everyone believe that She was dishonorable, and hurt those that She actually loved, that they would band together to fight as one against "the enemy", that enemy being Karanis. So She came up with that plan, and executed it a fashion only Karanis knows, irreversible death sentence, being unfaithful to Ragnar. Steeling Herself with everything She had, She layed a kiss right on Raziel and rode out of camp counting the breaths until She was cut down. But She wasnt cut down, She was allowed to leave. dammitbeavisthatwasnottheplandammitdammitdammit.
So She traveled..... with no plan, as She hadnt planned on living through what She did. She was lost, She was confused, and She needed to heal but had no plan.
She ended up in the Village by the Vosk, and became the Innkeeper. Long story short, Bjorin arrived ((and NO I had no idea He was coming, He told Me He was popping in to say goodbye because He was leaving Gor), things happened from there and He was supposed to come back to MTC to explain, and as far as I knew a the time, He had done that, come to find out, He hadnt and had took to cowards way out and I ended it with Him and was quite happy being by Myself. I had fabulously decorated rooms, and there was one that was always locked and only I was allowed entrance as that was my tuchuk room, where pictures of Rags, woobie, Siggarr, Terran and Amber were..... I tried to hide who I was for a long time as I didnt really know who I was and needed to heal.
Then came along a pirate by the name of IronWolf.
that was a nightmare.
not at first mind you, but eneded up being an absolute nightmare. At first is was great, it was distracting, but it soon became ridiculous and he ended up "claiming " Karanis.....lomg what a nightmare, did I mention it was a nightmare? We ended up in Port Kar and I hated it, GAWDS I hate Port Kar. But being a priate, he has to find Me to keep Me, so I left.... I have more money then I can ever spend, and now it happens to be spread all over gor LOL but I will gather it up slowly and have it returned here through messengers and merchants and other..... connections I now have....I then shelved her because I just couldnt play her for a while, I still wasnt healed....so I created another character.....
so now we enter where I unshelved Kar and have made My way back to Tuchuk. where it goes from here is anyone's guess, but know this.....no matter how anyone feels, I'm not going anywhere... My personal healing is done, now it is time to heal others.
