A couple of laughs.

[Gina]

While trying to escape through Pakistan, Osama Bin Laden found a bottle
on the sand and picked it up.

Suddenly, a female genie rose from the bottle and with a
smile said, "Master, may I grant you one wish?"

Osama responded,"You ignorant, unworthy daughter-of-a-dog!
Don't you know who I am? I don't need any common
woman giving me anything."

The shocked genie said, "Please, I must grant you a wish or I will be
returned to that bottle forever."

Osama thought a moment, then grumbled about the impertinence
of the woman and said,"Very well, I want to awaken with three American
women in my bed in the morning. So just do it
and be off with you.

" The annoyed genie said, "So be it!" and disappeared.

The next morning Bin Laden woke up in bed with Lorena
Bobbitt, Tonya Harding, and Nancy Pelosi at his side.

His penis was gone, his knees were broken, and he had no health insurance


*********************************

George Bush, Queen Elizabeth, and Vladimir Putin all die and go to hell.  While there, they spy a red phone and ask what the phone is for.  The devil tells them it is for calling back to Earth.  Putin asks to call Russia and talks for 5 minutes.  When he was finished the devil informs him that the cost is a million dollars, so Putin writes him a check.

Next Queen Elizabeth calls England and talks for 30 minutes.  When she was finished the devil informs her that cost is 6 million dollars, so Queen Elizabeth writes him a check.
 
Finally George Bush gets his turn and talks for 4 hours.  When he was finished the devil informed him that there would be no charge for the call and feel free to call the USA anytime.

When Putin hears this he goes ballistic and asks the devil why Bush got to call the USA free.
 
The devil replied, "Since Obama became president of the USA, the country has gone to hell, so naturally it's a local call.."

[Gina]

Little boy on the Bus
 
A little boy got on the bus, sat next to a man reading a book, and
noticed he had his collar on backwards. The little boy asked why he
wore   his collar backwards.

The man, who was a priest, said, 'I am a Father.'

The little boy replied, 'My Daddy doesn't wear his collar like that.'

The priest looked up from his book and answered, ''I am the Father of many.'

The boy said, ''My Dad has 4 boys, 4 girls and two grandchildren and he doesn't wear his collar that way!'

The priest, getting impatient, said. 'I am the Father of hundreds', and
went back to reading his book.

The little boy sat quietly thinking for a while, then leaned over and
said, 'Maybe you should wear a condom and put your pants on backwards instead of your collar.'

 

 

 




 



 


 




 




 




 




 








 



 


 




 









 








 



 


 




 









 
 



 


 




 

[RAGNAR]