You are striving for a life full of activity and experience and, perhaps even more, an environment where you would be able to forge a close bond with a person who can offer full emotional fulfilment.
You are feeling very vulnerable at this time. Nothing seems to be going in the right direction - business wise, private-life wise, everything. You need some emotional security and an environment which could possibly provide fewer problems, but the way you are feeling you can't be bothered even to make the effort.
We are all conditioned by our environment and as such we respond to people's perception of ourselves, but you feel that conditions are not right at this time. You are experiencing certain reservations that are precluding you to develop a particular relationship, business or personal, that is being offered. It is 'make your mind up time' - the decision is all yours, but whatever decision you make, it will be the right one.
Your ability to withstand the pressures of everyday life have been overtaxed and this is leading to stress and frustrations. It would seem that for the time being you have lost the resilience and strength of will necessary to contend with existing difficulties. You feel that it is all 'too much' and, try as you may, you are getting nowhere. But to give you credit, you continue to stand your ground and pursue your objectives with a fierce intensity. Naturally this situation is subjecting you to intolerable stress and pressure from which you would dearly like to escape, but you can not bring yourself to make the necessary decision. As a result you remain firmly involved in the problem and you can neither view it objectively nor get rid of it - you cannot leave it alone and you feel that you will only be at peace when you have reached your objective.
The fear that you may not be able to fulfil or realise all of your ambitions makes you work and play hard. The thought of being prevented from achieving the things you want leads you to play your part with frantic fervour.